It's not often that I write about my feelings here...
I'm frustrated. I'm trying to write another song for the album (to replace one that I'm not thrilled with) and it's not coming. I feel awkward and off somehow...off tune...off time...off energy...I hate feeling this way! I'm fighting negative feelings toward things I have no control over and it's sapping my strength. Lord, save me from drowning!! At this point I feel like giving up! The only thing that keeps me going is remembering why I'm doing this in the first place. God is speaking through this music - I know that. I also know that when I'm on stage and I'm singing and playing my piano, I feel amazing. I love being on stage.
I haven't been on stage much lately. I'm singing the anthem for the Lethbridge Hurricanes this season and I really enjoy that, but I miss being on stage with a group. I feel like a piece of me is missing when I'm not playing music...I've been missing a lot of pieces lately.
Is this just a phase? Will this pass? Can I get over this writer's block and this despondent feeling? Will this album ever be completed? Will I be proud of it when it's done? I have full faith in Brad and his musicians...they are the most talented bunch of people I've ever worked with. I don't worry about their abilities, I worry about mine!
Prayer family...please pray a layer of peace over me... and then pray a covering of JOY on top of that! I've been missing that.
Love to all of you...thank you for listening to me rant...I'm sorry this post is so blech...I promise I'll try and do better next time.
Michele
ROCK 2017!!
7 years ago
8 comments:
Oh Michele, you need a big hug! I wish I had a little trick for you, something that would get you into groove for writing. Sadly, I don't. There's no "writing songs" genes in this body. Trinity on the other hand comes up with songs all the time! Let's see...maybe you could play Barbie's, that always works! Or go outside or take a long ride in the car. Riker can attest to that one, she drives him insane with her singing!
As for apoligizing and promising to do better next time...forget it! What is your blog for if not to be an outlet for whatever your feeling or doing?? I'd rather hear this than something fake!
Chin up girl! I love you!
Into God's Word and Prayer. That's where the answers are. God is amazing in the way He speaks to us when we get to the end of ourselves and focus on Him.
Meanwhile, sometimes a break is the best thing in the world to do. Play with your kids and your hubby and enjoy a lighthearted period. Life can get too serious sometimes. And know that God is listening to a lot of other people praying on your behalf and all things will work out together for GOOD to those that love the Lord. I'll be praying for you.
Where would I be without my family behind me? God put you all in my life knowing no one else in the world could do what you do for me! Thank you for your prayers, and most of all, for your support! I love you!!
P.S. Jobina, tell Trinity she may have to give me song writing lessons at Christmas...I promise to be an attentive student!
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